I jerk awake to the sound of the baby monitor. Crap! I fell asleep! He knew I would, that swindler! I disentangle myself from Christian’s limbs and head down the hall to Teddy’s room, which seems a mile away in my exhausted state. Why do we live in a house so big that the nursery is practically in another state!
I get the baby diapered and fed, hatch a plan, and get back to bed to replenish my energy for the all out assault I am intending.
Three hours later, Teddy gets me up again. While we have our quite time together, I sing “Happy 2 week birthday” to him. Once he is back to sleep, I decide to execute my plot.
I slip back into our room where Christian is sleeping sprawled out across the bed. I slither up to him. Hmmm, I’ll start at his neck. I begin kissing him right below his earlobe, using just my lips at first, then using my tongue to lick from his earlobe down to his collarbone. I start to kiss across to the other side when he wakes with a jolt, and in half a second I am on my back pinned to the bed.
I don’t understand, why is he saying no? Doesn’t he want me anymore? Then it dawns on me. I’m out of shape, I just had a baby…I don’t turn him on anymore. The spell is broken. “You…you don’t want to?” I am trying my hardest not to cry.
“Christ, Ana, of course I want to! I spend hours on hours each day thinking how I want to and what I want to do with you and to you! It takes every ounce of strength I have to hold back, especially when half of you is constantly exposed. You just had a baby! We need to wait. For the love of God, Ana, don’t make this any more grueling that it is already!” Oh, yes, he wants me. Now to convince him.
“Christian, with what we do, there are rules. Correct?” He is staring at me and I meet his gaze, attempting to compel him to answer.
“Yes, Ana, there are rules.” Christian is eyeing me suspiciously and his grip on my shoulders remains firm.
“Well Dr. Green has provided some rules for us. Penetration is not allowed, but orgasms are allowed. Certainly someone with your expertise can think of several pleasing ways to comply with these rules, can’t you?”
His lips are pursed as he contemplates the gauntlet laid down before him. I feel time suspended as I wait for his response. Then he gives his answer haltingly. “Yes, Mrs. Grey, I believe I can.” Woo hoo! He raises his hand to my cheek, brushes back my hair, “God, I love you.” Then his lips are on mine, gently, softly. He pulls back and I take the opening to roll him onto the mattress and prop myself up over him.
“Tell me what you love about me.”
Christian gazes at me for a moment, then speaks. “I love your laugh. Each time I hear it my whole being is uplifted.” As he speaks, I kiss his neck and begin moving down to his chest.
“I love your wit. You challenge my mind and bring humor to my life.” I work my way to his nipples, kissing and sucking one, then the other.
“I love your eyes. They pierce through me to my soul.” I continue down his torso, moving from side to side leaving no spot untouched.
“I love your intellect and ambition. I am filled with pride with how you impress and accomplish.” I nuzzle his belly button and kiss his happy trail.
“I love your compassion. No less a heart could have reached mine.” I let my tongue trail from one hip bone to another.
“I love your body, every inch of it, what I can do to it, and what you do to me with it.” And with that, I take him in my mouth and he is silent save for the sound of his breath.
I love this, the moments he relinquishes power to me. He is at my mercy and I savor each second. I can choose to go slow or fast, to tease him, to make him beg. At a very measured pace I move down then up, appreciating every inch of my husband. I pause at his tip, leaving just my tongue making contact. Christian is holding his breath as he waits for me to move. “Ana.” It is a plea, so I smile and comply. I resume my attention, steadily increasing my pace until he is on the edge. I create a pattern of several soft strokes, followed by a long slow stroke with my lips clamped tightly around him. As I sense him near the precipice, I swirl my whole mouth around him and then suck hard, and effectively, and he groans as he comes.
I glide up to lie beside Christian. “Mrs. Grey, you are the most delightful wake up call.” I melt. Then he is kissing me, and traveling down my body, slowly and teasingly. It feels like it has been so long, I just crave his touch on my sex. Christian seems to know this, and he kisses me everywhere but there. Arms, hands, feet, legs, back and forth across my belly, down my sides. I think I will burst soon. At last he lays between my legs, and blows on me gently.
“Ana, I need you tell me if anything is uncomfortable. I need to trust that you will not let me hurt you.”
“I will,” I rasp. “Please, Christian.” He hesitates for a moment, then his mouth is on me. I cry out, it is so heavenly. It does not take long for me to crest as I call out “Oh, Christian!”
My beloved husband moves beside me. “Don’t you feel better now?” I ask.
“Yes and no. I’m afraid it will only whet my appetite, making it even more of a Herculean endeavor to keep away from you.” As he says this I feel his erection expanding against my leg. I’m about to take matters in hand, when Teddy squeals over the monitor. We both sigh. “I believe our son is telling us that is enough for today.”
“Enough for now, maybe. But the day is young” I retort as I slip on my robe and head down the hall.
An hour later, Christian and I are dressed and having blueberry pancakes. As it is Memorial Day, Christian will be home today, though I would bet (and win) that he will end up in his study at some point. Christian worked from home the week after Teddy was born, and returned to the office last week. I was surprised at how much I missed his company. Maybe it was because I was not working. Christian is emphatic that maternity leave is for Teddy and I, not for me to work from home. I highly suspect he is checking my Grey Publishing email account for traffic. Nevertheless, I am blithe to have him home on a Monday.
“The pediatrician will be here at 11 for Teddy’s checkup” Christian announces.
“But his appointment is at 2 tomorrow, at their offices?” What has the control freak done?
“He is two weeks today, he will have his two week checkup today. And Dr. Pembers was very willing to accommodate us and come here. Their offices are filled with sick kids in the waiting room, and I do not want to expose Teddy to all those germs. Didn’t you read the article about pediatrician’s waiting rooms that I sent you?”
What can I say to that? I give him a smile and an exaggerated eye roll. “I will find some way to dragoon you into relaxing. Teddy is not the first baby in the world and will persist through all the germs, colds, and boo boos just like the rest. You will not keep him in a cocoon, Mr. Grey.” I walk away, because I will not win today and any discussion with the self-proclaimed safety monitor involving a perceived risk, real or imagined, must be undertaken with great preparation – or distance. It is a lot easier to force my way if Christian isn’t in the room…or the building.
Dr. Pembers arrives promptly at 11, bringing with him a nurse, an infant scale, and the requisite doctor’s bag. Teddy and I enter the family room as they are setting up. “Thank you for coming to the house and for coming on a holiday, Dr. Pembers” I say, trying to sound apologetic.
“Well, Mr. Grey can be quite insistent, can’t he?” I nod my ascent. What is there to say?
Christian joins us as Dr. Pembers gets underway. Teddy has grown three quarters of an inch and gained 5 ounces. The doctor pokes, prods and examines, and Christian peppers him with questions. He must have found some checklist online for the well visit – he probably forwarded it to me, too. I should check.
I can tell the doctor’s patience is running thin, but he remains calm and answers all Christian’s questions. The only giveaway is an occasional deep breath. Finally, Teddy is declared a healthy and happy 2 week old.
Christian’s cell phone rings as the doctor and nurse are packing up. It really would have been much easier at their offices. I overhear part of his conversation before he glances at me and heads to his study. “I see. What aversion tactics are advisable? Okay, consider it done.”
After the good doctor takes his leave and Teddy has been fed, Christian and I sit down to a lunch of leftovers from yesterday’s assembly. “What was that call about?” I pry.
Christian frowns “A contract didn’t go as planned and there may be litigation. Nothing for you to worry about.” Nothing worries me more than these words. I am starting to learn that the more troubling something is, the less I am likely to know. If Christian felt in control with the issue, he would simply tell me. As I think this, a light bulb goes on…Christian has a tell! I had never put two and two together before. And now I’m worried, but I know better than to push my luck right this instant.
Teddy and I take a nap, while Christian works in his study. Afterwards, we go for a family stroll around the property. Teddy is safely ensconced in one of the four strollers we have acquired: one that works with the car seat, a jogging stroller so Christian can take him on runs, a Bugaboo regular stroller that is apparently what all the New York moms have, and the old fashioned baby carriage or pram, which Teddy is riding in now. I have a strong feeling this is going to be one of the few outings with the pram, but it was hard to stop Christian from buying one of everything in the baby store. He practically bought the store itself.
“What do you think of a swing set here?” Christian asks as we get past the meadow to the east side of the property.
“I think it is a little far from the house. We need to be closer so we can keep an eye out. Plus, you wouldn’t want a toddler to have a 10 minute walk to a bathroom, unless you plan on building a facility out here.” Christian looks perplexed. I add “and though I we’ve talked about leaving the meadow natural, I was thinking of maybe an English garden over here.”
“I like your suggestions Mrs. Grey.” He sighs and before I can query he adds “I’m used to thinking through so many things from every angle, to consider all the variables. But it seems when it comes to children, I have trouble contemplating each concern. Children need restrooms close by…it didn’t even cross my mind. Do you want to build a facility out here?”
I laugh, “Not really.” Before he doubts himself further, I change the topic. “Wouldn’t an extensive vegetable and herb garden be nice. It would need to be by the kitchen, so we could dash out and pick ingredients quickly.” We talk on as we stroll, envisioning a gazebo by the water, some fruit trees lining the drive. The perfect top off to a holiday weekend.